Self delusion is my optimism

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Have you ever been looked down upon,and discriminated by someone?And was that person your teacher?Well,i have.

Well it so happens,i got a teacher,who simply doesn't like me for various reasons.And cloaked under that big fake smile of hers,i see something that goes deeper.Clad somewhere in all her sarcasm,i smell detest.She simply sees me as a good for nothing,incapable of taking up any responsibilities.

Basing her judgements on daily work,or should i say work that concerns econs,you're deemed capable and adept at handling any form of responsibilities,or you're just good for nothing.If you're a goodie-two-shoes who doesn't procrastinate handing in of assignments,good for you,because that's gonna earn you a star in her books.Otherwise,if you're like me who occasionally do not hand in her assignments,you're condemned.

Other than just econs works,daily issues like whether or not you have your hair cut when she whines bout it,and stuff like whether you talk to the neighbouring class during flag raising.And of course,the main point which i'm gonna illustrate of her biased and twisted mentality of me.Chinese classes.One thing that irks her,and pleases me,is my A level chinese grade.Not that i did extremely well,but i did well enough to wipe the smile off her face.You see,apparently after i skipped like 3 chinese lessons last year,she concluded that perhaps theoretically,(which hwa chong people would most probably base most of their judgements on) i would most probably flunk chinese,and the best grade i should get was a D.And by some stroke of luck,or fortune,which in this case a misfortune for her i got a B.And apparently,she firmly believes,that Shi Rui the slacker doesn't deserve that.While this "slacker" got a B,her "model" students didn't seem to do better or as well,and that has most probably got on her nerves.

And recently i got a china buddy,whom i decided to "apply" for in hope of improving my mandarin (which is pretty horrendus) and having something else to list in my School Graduation Certificate.And being the sort of person she is,the moment she found out the china scholar was assigned to me,she began her grilling session of "I thought"s.And some went like this, "I thought you have to be well behaved and have good conduct" and "I thought that you have to be proficient at chinese".To which i rebutted with my own dose of sarcasm,"I did get a B grade you know."Seeing her walk away speechless and exasperated put a smile to my face.To me it was a sign of triumph.

Motivation to do well for the A levels has never been greater,the satisfaction derived from proving someone who belittles your abilities and capabilities wrong is too great to resist.A small battle won,and many more to go with my beloved tutor...

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